‘£5,800 on a watch?!’ What happened when five couples kept separate money diaries – then revealed all to their partners?

Published 2 August 2026 · health

‘What’s the point buying a £189 health tracker if you’re a smoker?’ Rachel and Kojo, Northampton Rachel, 38, met Kojo, 41, in 2020, a year

‘What’s the point buying a £189 health tracker if you’re a smoker?’ Rachel and Kojo, Northampton Rachel, 38, met Kojo, 41, in 2020, a year after divorcing the father of her two children, Amanda and Miles. Rachel works for the NHS, earning £27,000 a year. Kojo earns £32,000 as a school caretaker. They live in a three-bedroom home they bought in 2024 for £325,000. Their son, Marcus, and Rachel’s 13-year-old daughter, Amanda, live with them, while Miles, 17, splits his time between them and Rachel’s ex. The couple divide their £1,750 monthly mortgage and household bills. They each contribute £500 to a joint account for shared expenses, while keeping the rest of their finances separate. Rachel receives £150 a week in child maintenance from her e husband. Rachel Monday I work three days a week at a local hospital and have to pay to park – a complete joke (£8.50). No lunch cost as I’m microdosing [weight-loss drug] Mounjaro. On my break, I ordered another Mounjaro pen (£220). I also paid the weekly carpool fee for Miles and Amanda as they need transport after school (£60). Total: £288.50 Tuesday I bought a gym set online before my shift (£50), drove to work (£8.50) and bought some fruit and a wrap from the canteen (£7.20). Total: £65.70 Wednesday I went to work (£8.50) and afterwards headed to a bar to meet a school friend for a wine and some chicken wings (£11.50). My appetite is coming back. Stopped at Asda for crisps, salad and chicken nuggets for the kids’ snacks (£11.23), and bought an eyelash-perming set online (£12.50). Total: £43.73 Thursday A self-care morning. I had some skin treatments: a polynucleotide injection (£350), Botox, which I get every three months (£150), and 1ml filler in my cheeks and chin (£175). I feel great. Total: £675 Friday I picked up Marcus, Amanda and Miles from school and took them to Nando’s as a treat (£65.32). It used to be cheap! Later, tidied the house and went shopping with Marcus and Kojo. Total £65.32 Saturday Kojo, Marcus, Amanda and I went to a safari park. It was £130 for four, which is a lot, but Marcus loves the lions. I paid half from our joint account (£65). Kojo paid the other half plus lunch. Total: £65 Sunday Ordered some face serums online (£45) and a phone case for Amanda after hers broke (£12). Did a family shop at Tesco, which Kojo paid for. Total: £57 Weekly total: £1,260.25 Kojo Monday I walk to work and I get my food covered, so I generally don’t spend much in the week. I bought a packet of 20 Benson & Hedges (£18.50), which I smoke on the way to and from work. Total: £18.50 Tuesday Ordered new headphones (£75.50) and a Hume health watch (£189) as my birthday is coming up. I like tracking my sleep and hormone stats. Total: £264.50 Wednesday They served shepherd’s pie in the school canteen, which I hate, so I bought a cheese and ham baguette at a nearby cafe (£4.89). Total: £4.89 Thursday I bought some cigarillos, which I don’t tend to smoke as fast as cigarettes, as I’ve been smoking a bit more lately. Only a 10-pack this time. (£6.89). Total: £6.89 Friday I went to a department store with Rachel and bought Marcus a new pencil-case for school (£5.55), trainers (£32.50) and socks (£3.20), as well as a top Rachel wanted (£22.50). Total: £63.75 Saturday We went to the safari park and I paid half (£65) plus parking (£9). I also covered lunch for the four of us. We got burgers, chips and colas (£54.88). It was a fun, but expensive, day. Total: £128.88 Sunday The Tesco shop cost £135.30, which is about normal. I usually split it with Rachel, but I got it this week. Total: £135.30 Weekly total: £622.71 The big reveal … Rachel describes herself as “highly strung” when it comes to talking about money after separating from her former partner: “I ended up with nothing in my divorce.” When she and Kojo got together, she expected he might be more cautious about spending money on her children. Instead, she says: “He treats them as his own.” She is nervous about revealing her diary to him. She has increased her spending on beauty in recent years, trying to tackle low body confidence after three kids. Last month she flew to Turkey for a breast augmentation, at a cost of £5,000. Kojo was taken aback, but told Rachel to do what felt right. “I helped her research the clinic, but it was all her savings,” he said. Rachel puts larger purchases, such as her monthly Mounjaro injections and her Botox treatments, on her personal Amex, for which she pays off the minimum each month. “I’ve got a debt of around £2,500,” she says, during the diary reveal. “I didn’t know it was that high,” Kojo responds. Kojo is shocked at the cost of the treatments Rachel had during the week: “I had no idea how expensive all this was,” he says. “We could put some of that money towards a kitchen extension.” He reflects on how quickly these treatments have been normalised: “When we met, Rachel wasn’t doing any of this.” Rachel says a kitchen extension is out of their budget anyway and defends her purchases as paramount for her mental health. “I’m a mum. My treats make me look and feel better, unlike Kojo’s smoking.” His £25-a-week cigarette habit, which he keeps hidden from the family, is more expensive than she thought. She also finds his health tech splurges contradictory. “What’s the point in buying a £189 health watch if you’re a smoker?” she asks. Kojo found the diary-sharing fine, except for the smoking reveal. “I’d like to give up. I’m a bit ashamed of how much I spent. Rachel has been on at me for years to quit.” He says the task demystified their finances and showed them where they could work together more effectively. “I see where we can plug a few holes,” he says. “A £1,260 spend per week from Rachel is a lot.” The task also illuminated Rachel’s body insecurities to Kojo. “Maybe it’s my fault: I need to tell her how beautiful she is more regularly,” he says. “She doesn’t need to spend all that on beauty treatments, but I won’t try to control her choices.” ‘I like buying food in bulk, but Jasper buys stuff as and when, which annoys me as it’s less economical’ Caitlin and Jasper, Bristol Caitlin, an accountant on £94,000, and Jasper, a tax adviser on £103,000, both 34, met on Tinder 10 years ago. They got married in 2024 and Caitlin is six months pregnant with their first child, conceived by IVF. They live with their si year-old chihuahua, Beanie (“a diva”), in a five-bed Victorian house, which they are renovating. The cost of that, at £20,000, is split between them, with Jasper also putting in his bonus from work. The pair pay £3,500 into a joint pot each month to cover bills, holidays, house expenses and their two cars, but also have separate bank accounts. Caitlin Monday I ordered a cute baby outfit online from a sustainable brand (£19.20) while I worked from home. I also bought some new cushion covers for our spare room sofa (£28). Total: £47.20 Tuesday Our food shop from Tesco arrived. It was £83.45; we split it (£41.72). I like buying food in bulk, but Jasper buys stuff as and when, which annoys me as it’s less economical. I got some milk before the shop arrived (75p) and a dog treat for Beanie (£2.20). Total: £44.67 Wednesday I paid for the wood (£295) for new skirting boards at B&Q and a sander from Argos (£25), as Jasper said he didn’t want to shell out from the joint account. The measuring and calculating was easy, but the sanding is much more laborious. Jasper says he will help, as my mobility isn’t great. Total: £320 Thursday We are going to London next weekend to see friends and booked a bougie hotel on the Elizabeth line at £200 per night for three nights. I paid half (£300). Total: £300. Friday I went to the office in Bristol city centre. I got just under half a tank of petrol on the way (£32).